Where Does Your Satisfaction Come From? What Does this Word Mean to You?

I honestly had no intentions of making this post by any means up until a few hours ago. I currently keep a notebook where I list my various topic ideas for the future and I suppose this will somewhat include some of those concepts as well as others I’ve mentioned in the past. A great deal was honestly inspired reading posts from a fellow blogger which made me realize that I had been thinking about this more so than I had even fully acknowledged recently.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, I am truly so in love with the world of blogging in terms of being able to share ideas and thoughts with others. Blogging is more a personal autobiographical diary for me above all else really. If anyone appreciates or takes anything from it, that is all really just a plus to me.

Stay on topic, Cailin!

This all really goes hand in hand with what has even had all this on my mind recently though. Anyone who may have read my introductory post would have seen that I came across WordPress completely by accident while filling out a job application. I created one myself primarily at first just to get a feel for the site if I did manage to get the position I applied for. (I did not if you’re curious.)

Blogging and writing has always been appealing to me and something I was interested in trying but never pursued for whatever reason.

(I feel like I’m making this more about blogging which was not my intention…)

My overall point in all this rambling I suppose is that I’m a big believer in that everything happens for a reason for the most part. I’ve also found that this is a great outlet for me to occasionally organize the endless flow of thoughts that constantly occur within my head.

Jumping back to me pursuing other means of employment recently is what primarily put the current topic of discussion back into my mind. One I have always often come back to over the years for a number of reasons.

What I do for a job/career has honestly never been that important to me. I honestly have a ton of respect for anyone who truly knows what they want for themselves in this regard in many ways! When I was younger I always just wanted to help people until I realized that this could never be achieved for me in the way I wanted it to be. (I’ve mentioned this more in depth in previous posts so I won’t continue to ramble any further on unrelated things.)

My primary reason for bringing this up is with my current change in circumstances over the past few months I feel like once again I find myself bombarded by others who feel I don’t apply myself and/or waste my potential. I was completely content and happy with my old profession as well as past and future endeavors. As stated above this has never been important to me.

In all honestly, what anyone does for a living isn’t really of any interest to me for the most part. I care far more about who you are as a person and in life than your status or how much money you may make. You could make a million dollars a year and I could care less if you aren’t a good person. Granted some are able to combine helping others and/or including their passions within their professions but for most, sadly, this is not a realistic luxury. I feel this applies more nowadays than ever before.

I have never been a materialistic person in any sense whether it be what I wear, drive, own, or where I live. None of this has ever meant anything to me, nor does it matter to me in terms of anyone else’s life. If I ever do find myself overly wealthy for some reason I would probably still drive a “beater” vehicle and live in a smaller home with rather “bohemian” decor, ha ha!

I’ve never understood anyone who desires status and/or wealth feeling that this will somehow make them happy or have this need to prove anything to anyone else.

As long as I am surrounded by good people that I love, being a good person, helping others whenever I can expecting nothing in return, all while truly believing I am doing my best than what more could I ask for?

I really meant the entire theme of this post involving “satisfaction” in the generalist terms I possibly could!

I mean it also in the ways I just stated above including never expecting anything from anyone when I’m nice to them or help them. I feel like many do this for the sense of satisfaction or achievement which I will never understand as well.

I feel others even with some things can almost force a sense of satisfaction out of wanting to prove something and/or other exceptions of society in a completely different way. For example, the way that some may be obsessed with taking photos of themselves, others, places, or experiences just to prove they have/did them? (If that makes any sense at all…) I feel this reigns true more now than ever with “social media” being so important to many.

As also just mentioned above, I truly feel I have always lived and tried my absolute hardest in all aspects of life regardless of what anyone else may think about me. If I was to die tomorrow for whatever reason I would do so knowing that I was content and happy with myself all around until this point. I’ve had a great life so far honestly with many different types of experiences and people with hopefully much more still to come that I can’t even imagine.

I feel that many seem to limit their own personal satisfaction by things that other people or society put in place for them. They think they need an established career, to get married, purchase a house, have children, etc. and while all these things are well and good allowing many to feel a sense of satisfaction. You should by no means feel this is the only path to take or the only things that matter.

(I’d like to point out I have previously accomplished all of the aforementioned in the past for the record! None of this when all was said and done made me particularly happy for a number of reasons, with the only exception being my children.)

I guess I should wrap up this rambling once again with my initial question in the title of this post!

Where does your satisfaction come from?

What does this word even really mean?

I honestly couldn’t be more intrigued to potentially hear others thoughts on this subject!

As stated above, however, this is more just me needing to work out the thoughts in my own mind. About how others have recently made me reflect and think about my own actions and achievements. I know I can honestly say without a doubt that I am happy and down right proud of myself and how I’ve lived my life so far.

I don’t care what anyone else thinks about it and I never will!

Neither should you!

Whatever makes you happy and leaves you feeling satisfied with your life than keep doing it!

What else is life about?

Thank you so much for Reading!

(Jeez…I had a feeling that was going to be a long one no matter how hard I tried but come on girl…I really am the ramble on queen whether in real life or in writing even when I try my best, ha ha!)

“Lake Como, Belmar”by Khaz is licensed under CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

Trans-Topic Thursdays! The Importance of Always Being Yourself! (By No Means Strictly a Trans Related Post!)

One thing I can not stand almost more than anything else is fake people! Something about this type of person, at least for me personally, is always so easy to pick up on and identify right off the bat. I couldn’t pin point exactly what it is about them that makes it so obvious per se. I feel it primarily has to just be mainly you can tend to tell when a person is trying to hard I suppose? I would imagine this has to become quite exhausting on occasion.

I’ve made it a habit since I was very young to only surround myself with genuine people whenever I was able to make the choice on who I spent my time with. I can’t think of many close friends I’ve ever had in my life that didn’t fit this qualification.

I understand fully that in some circumstances in can sometimes be necessary to put up some type of front or “wear a mask” as they say. Depending on the type of work environment you may find yourself in for example. I know I have personally worked many jobs that required a healthy amount of customer service. This sure does not mean that I keep up this level of presentation with my coworkers or even all customers however. I know a good majority of us can often hold back when first meeting someone whether it be a new potential friend or family member. This is completely normal as well! I’m talking mainly in the sense of once these relationships have been established for a reasonable amount of time.

I know for myself that any ability I ever had to hide anything of myself from anyone has all but completely faded since I started hormones and began transitioning.

(See, we are getting into why this is more of a trans-topic post now!)

I’m not entirely sure if this is more based on the mental changes I have undergone, just being tired of holding back my full “true self” for so long, or the latter.

I can say from my own experience and interactions with other transgender individuals that you will rarely encounter one of us that isn’t completely a genuine person! This applies more so once you get farther into your transition I feel for the most part but this is by no means always the case!

A piece of advice I’d like to give to those who may be just beginning to transition (or really anyone for that matter) is letting yourself fully find out who you are. I mean this more in the sense as to never feel the need to limit yourself by expectations!

Never let anyone or anything make you feel that you have to be anything that you’re not!

What I mean by this mainly to give an example, I tended to feel like early on in my own transition that some expected me to like overly change somehow in the sense that I would be stereo-typically more “girly” or something along these lines.

Do not get me wrong!

I am plenty “girly” in a number of different ways, ha ha!

However, I would say I am far from being dominantly so!

I am beyond “tom-boyish” in plenty of ways as well!

Once again though, what is all this honestly based on in the first place except for certain expectations put in place by our society?

What exactly is it that make such things absolutely have to be more preferred or “normal” by one gender over the other?

Why can’t people just be people?

I suppose this can sound a bit odd from someone who felt so strongly about their gender identity that they felt the need to change certain aspects of herself to feel more comfortable but I would hope you understand my point here, ha ha!

Back to just talking more in a general sense!

I feel like a common area this can apply for anyone is often being embarrassed or ashamed of your interests.

Whether they may be considered nerdy/geeky (whatever the heck this even means once again!) or anything in general for whatever reason a friend/family member of yours doesn’t approve of.

First and foremost!

Learn to stop caring at all what people think about you in any sense of the word!

I realize that this can be much easier said than done depending on the situation but does it really need to be?

Own whatever it is that you enjoy and makes you yourself!

And love yourself for it!

We are all incredibly unique people and this is what makes us all fantastically amazing!

No one else in this world no matter what will ever be exactly who you are!

Remember this!

Not only have I personally embraced my gender identity over the past five or so years but this process has also made me learn to be myself completely and fully! (Whether I want to be or not for the most part as stated above, ha ha!) I have all but ceased trying to hide my “weird” and often “crazy” self from anyone no matter who you are! Random stranger on street, my friends, my family, anyone!

I know I already stated this above but once again learn to love yourself for what makes you special!

I can almost guarantee that if you own whatever makes you uniquely yourself that you will become a ton happier than you have ever been in your life!

(As I often like to include in various posts! Always keeping in mind as long as this never involves harming anyone or causing anyone any kind of pain! If you do feel like this then please do yourself a favor and seek some type of help, ha ha!)

If you don’t love yourself for whatever reason right now, take comfort in the fact that even though I might not know you, I love you!

I mean this sincerely!

I tend to be cursed with this ability to always see the good in people and find something I like about you even with the aforementioned “faker” types. I’m sure you have your reasons for acting the way you do!

Thank you so much for Reading!

“Morning Hike”by SewPixie is licensed under CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

Random Song Wednesday! Hatsune Miku: Rolling Girl

To be completely honest this was fairly far down on my list initially of songs I planned to introduce in this new up and coming series.

I suppose it does further prove my point of entailing just how vast my musical tastes truly are, ha ha!

I guess it also may come as no surprise to some considering I have made a fair amount of anime/otaku related posts so far and claim for it to be one of my primary topics of discussion.

I do, however, only slightly dabble in the ways of the various Asian inspired music that exists whether that be K-Pop/Rock or Vocaloid productions.

For those of you who may not be aware of the world of Vocaloids, they are artificial personalities and performers who can on occasion even be projected as holograms during concerts and the like.

The voices themselves are usually completely unique and fabricated using a combination of methods. While, I am not typically a fan of modified voices usually, I feel that in this situation it’s interesting and fun to see what they can do vocally in some songs things that could not be achieved with “normal human” capabilities.

Many different Vocaloids have come into existence at this point but one of the first and more well know is Hatsune Miku! You can find her adorable persona all over the web, on various merchandise, marketing purposes, etc.

I truly do find this world fascinating for a number of reasons. One of her songs even include a description of the complexity that can exist in this very concept.

The song included in this post will always remain one of my favorites! Not only for being one of the first I was introduced to but because it really is just all around an incredible song both musically and lyrically.

“Rolling Girl,” as the title slightly hints at, is a song about a girl who has had an extremely rough life so far and has become accustomed to “rolling with the punches” as they say.

It is extremely deep and something I feel most of us can relate to in some way. The video itself I feel is very powerful and almost perfectly encapsulates the heart and feeling behind the piece.

(I have linked the Japanese version of the song with English subtitles included but versions of the song/video exist as well if you may find yourself interested. I always feel it is better first to hear any media in it’s original language first personally.)

Without further ado, I present to you…

Hatsune Miku: Rolling Girl

Rolling Girl always looked at unreachable dreams
Making a fuss if you got inside her head and disturbed, disturbed.

“No problem.” Was murmured, but weren’t those words lost?
Fail again, fail again.
After ending your search for mistakes, it spins again!

Once more, once more.
“I’ll also roll today,”
That girl says, that girl says,
Playing her words with meaning

“Are you better now?”
“It’s still a ways off, I still don’t see the point. I’m gonna stop my breathing, now.”

Rolling Girl is at the end of the ruins, beyond unreachable colors
Overlapping voices with voices and blending, blending.

“No problem.” Was murmured, but those words were lost.
How are you going to turn out good?
Even the hill tempting me is making mistakes now.

Once more, once more.
Somehow I’m rolling.
That girl said, That girl said
Repeating silent words with meaning

“Are you better now?”
“Just a bit more, and you’ll see something soon. I’m gonna stop my breathing, now.”

Once more, once more.
“I’ll also roll today,”
That girl says, that girl says,
Playing her words with a smile

“Are you better now? It’s okay now. Let’s go, you must be tired as well, right?”
I wanna stop my breathing, now.

I hope you enjoyed it!

“hatsune miku”by 夜の猫さま is licensed under CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

Media Mondays! All the Greats Come from New Jersey! (I Know Not All…but a Good Amount!)

I was born and bred in New Jersey so granted I may be slightly bias when it comes to this particular topic.

I’m a Jersey Girl through and through!

Anyone who has ever had the pleasure would know we truly are one of a kind!

I don’t know what exactly it is about Jersey folk that seems to bring about some type of special unique quality but from my interactions with people from other places it is without a doubt undeniable!

It’s an attitude, presence and just overall state of being that I truly don’t think can be compared to anything else for whatever reason.

New Jersey may have a lot of flaws even more so now than ever honestly but I will always love the fact that I grew up here. How many other places can you go that literally have practically anything you can find anywhere else. Granted it may not be the best version of it by any stretch but we have beaches, mountains, cities, and probably a lot more country areas than those who have never visited before realize.

Every year, however, things just continue to become extremely more expensive and overpopulated!

(I would seriously debate finding somewhere else to live at this point if I wasn’t tied to my current area for a number of reasons.)

This overpopulation itself is probably one of the more important factors for why so many well known individuals have come from the state let alone the mentality.

I’m sure a good majority of the more well known famous people many have heard of and/or are aware of. Such as Frank Sinatra, Whitney Houston, Danny DeVito, Buzz Aldrin, just to name a few of the random examples I can think of without even having to look.

I assure you though!

If you were to run a simple search you would probably be utterly shocked by the sheer number of people you would recognize who were either born and/or raised in New Jersey.

Whether it be musicians, actors, historical figures, etc. clearly something must be “in the water” to bring about such a plethora of amazing people from so many different industries.

I feel in particular that this applies when it comes to music. Most of my favorite bands are from New Jersey without even going out of my way to make it so. Jersey has an incredible underground music scene as well as more mainstream aspects.

Trust me when I say it’s a lot more diverse than just “gangster style” movie stereotype people, ha ha!

No matter where I may end up in my life in the future New Jersey will always be my home and I will love it forever!

Thank you so much for Reading!

“Jersey City Backstreets”by Friscocali is licensed under CC BY-NC 2.0

“Seaside Heighs Ferris Wheel”by Khaz is licensed under CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

I’ve Never Felt Age was as Relevant as Some Often Make it Seem.

I’d like to first start by saying do not get me wrong at all to think I don’t feel that age can in some circumstances hold some level of relevance. I do feel, however, that more often that not it is rarely all that relative at all.

I feel shortly after most of us finish our varying levels of education/enter the workforce that people typically have a general sense of who they are and how they view the world. Not to say that some are not open and capable of changing in major ways but this in itself tends to be a bit of a rarity in my opinion.

I remember coming to this realization fairly soon in my early twenties. When you are still in school in your teens many still seem to have this view that “adults” are so much different than themselves at the time. (My sister being a very funny example of this still seeming to feel this way even now being 30.)

When I first became employed at a company full time regularly beginning to interact with others of all ages I came to the conclusion that by this point in most people lives that age really doesn’t mean anything. Everyone for the most part is primarily the same when it comes to what they may want, need, or desire. They have hopes, dreams, struggles, opinions, etc.

I remember I used to hardly be able to stand when anyone would jump to any type of conclusions about me as a person based solely on age. I have never considered myself to be typical in this sense often referring to the old expression of being an “old soul.” I have always thought and reflected on things that sometimes those much older than me at the time probably still have never gave a second thought in their lives.

I try my absolute best to remember to keep this mindset whenever I tend to interact with others who are younger than myself. I currently work with a young man who was only 19 when I initially met him. I have had more mature and thought provoking conversations with this person even more so than I have with people double or even triple his age. I often have even on some occasions forgotten how young he is sometimes because he in no way reflects any type of stereotypical “youth mentalities.”

Once again, this is all not to say that age does not in fact sometimes have relevance in some circumstances. Situations such as building a life for yourself including various achievements you hoped to obtain and being able to support yourself are primarily things that some can only learn with time. This concept itself is in no way a universal truth for all though as well by any means. You could be born into wealth or become famous at a young age for example.

This leads right into my next point being that a person’s age in no way reflects experiences they may have had that others can never relate to. This could range from simple things to ones that are very extreme. They could have lost a parent or friend at a young age, struggled with different types of abuse, come from a completely different national origin than you, the list is literally endless but I think you get my point.

You really can never know what goes on in someone’s head or what they may have dealt with simply just going by age or appearances.

This is just a simple thought I’ve always had in my life since I was very young and have often discussed with others. It is in no way intended to be taken all that seriously. I feel it is simply an interesting concept that can vary greatly in the opinions others may share.

I mean even think about in the distant past how short lifespans were and how different things could be as far as when people would achieve various “life milestones.” Age is as relevant as time itself. It honestly is all more just a matter of perception and how you choose to view things.

So, next time you may make a snap judgement about a person whether they be younger or older than you, maybe just take a second to really think about that before you do!

Thank you so much for Reading!

“DSC06567”by Poisoned_Pics_Photography is licensed under CC BY-SA 2.0

“Ageing”by paulbence is licensed under CC BY-NC 2.0

Trans-Topic Thursdays! My Recent Experience Trying Dating Apps for the First Time!

As the title would suggest, I recently only a short while ago decided to finally experiment with dating apps for the first time ever in my life.

I’m a very traditional girl in every sense of the word when it comes to relationships and the like.

I’m not the type to do one night stands or any type of random hook ups really. I prefer to actually date someone that I share a real connection with and don’t do so very often. I can easily count the number of serious relationships I’ve ever really had on one hand.

I’ve always been a sucker for “movie magic romance” I suppose.

Two people meet in real life by chance, instantly share a connection and it just grows from there. Maybe a good old damsel in distress scenario, love at first sight or any of the other various movie cliches they make you believe as a child, ha ha!

Clearly, I’m grown up a lot and have realized it takes a lot more than such things to make a relationship work. The sole reason for me expressing all this is simply I never thought I would ever try any type of dating app in my life.

So, how did it go you might be wondering?

I barely even know where to begin…

I was absolutely overwhelmed with messages to say the least! Easily over a hundred only within the first day or so…

I’ve only played around with two separate apps so far so I’m sure results can vary greatly depending on which ones you may try but I primarily dealt with the same things on both of these.

First of all, being transgendered, I am never one not to disclose this information to someone the second they show any type of romantic interest in me. (This has really hurt in a number of ways previously in “real life” for the record which may even be what prompted me to try this is the first place.) In both of my profiles I made sure to express I was trans right away in the first section of my introduction.

Yet still…

A good majority of men clearly don’t read this at all and I found myself on multiple occasions dealing with them being both shocked and/or disgusted!

This makes a girl feel fantastic I assure you! (Trademark Sarcasm!)

After I get done sorting through these lovely types of people I’ve found that three main groups of others remain!

Regular run of the mill perverts/creeps! (Which I know all woman have experienced whether they want to or not!)
Fetish types! (Who rarely are even well informed on trans-related topics)
The very elusive potentially good guy!

I wouldn’t imagine I need to say much about how creepy some men can be. No offense to some of you gentlemen! Seriously, I even felt the need to eventually put in my profile that I won’t even respond if you instantly show me a pic of your “private areas,” then isn’t that almost enough said? Let alone just the instantaneous random very inappropriate comments!

Now, fetish types, this one almost deserves it’s own post in the future so I’ll try to keep this brief. If you at all attempt to approach or date a trans-person I can almost guarantee 100% of the time that they will never want to viewed as anything but themselves! If you have any interest in us just for being what we are then you need to GO AWAY!

This almost became a game to me at a point to make it my own personal pleasure to destroy these types of people! I would only do this after trying my best to honestly educate them on transgender individuals before so for the record.

This leads me right into my next point that applies to both these first two groups, being simply that in some circumstances that being transgendered somehow implies that you are “desperate” in the eyes of some people. I don’t understand what puts this idea in some peoples heads and maybe it doesn’t apply to all but it sure does to me! I have stayed single for quite some time by choice for the most part I promise you! I actually ended up adding this to my profile eventually as well even though it was about as helpful as everything else included on it…

Lastly, that leaves the extremely seldom found actually decent person who actually wants to attempt to have a conversation with you! I’d say from my experience this is roughly about 1/10 or so which is probably almost being a bit generous…

My experience so far in communicating with this rare breed has been quite the mixed bag. Sometimes it seems like you two are getting along extremely well only for them to turn out to be one of the other previously two mentioned types of people or just disappearing without any reason/word a good majority of the time.

I have since still, somewhat continued to talk to a few individuals off these apps but I’m not sure if anything will ever come from them or not. I did meet one person so far in person which went reasonably well but after that night I have yet to hear from them again. (Probably because I was unwilling to perform certain acts on our first meeting if your curious…)

I think I’ve learned the best way to approach this type of thing is to simply have no serious expectations and just try your best to keep it fun and casual?

I know many people I know personally have been lucky enough to find real long lasting relationships so I believe that it’s possible and some level of hope for achieving this exists if that’s what you so desire. If you go in with the mindset of knowing what you want or are looking for then I think it’s worth trying at least. Just certainly expect quite a wide variety of people to sort through before finding someone looking for something similar.

I personally don’t know how much longer I intend to keep using them myself honestly. I already have not used them for at least a week and have no idea if I plan to return to continue to do so currently.

Why do I have to be cursed with being such a romantic?!?

Kidding for the most part, but I do feel a certain level of truth exists in this statement for those who may feel similar to myself.

Dating sucks whether it’s the old fashioned way or by newer means!

I will always believe that eventually everyone will find love and happiness with someone else if that’s what they truly hope to find!

We all deserve love and support in our lives no matter who that may come from!

I feel like this post has ended up way longer than I intended even with trying my best to hold back so I’ll wrap it up here, as always…

Thank you so much for Reading!

“From Ads to Avenue of Chat: A History of Online Dating” by Jenny Waterson is licensed under CC BY-NC-ND 4.0

Random Song Wednesdays! Alex Turner: Stuck on a Puzzle (A Potential New Series?)

I was thinking instead of doing “Wordless Wednesday” which I’ve become a huge fan of, that I would do something similar to this as a replacement!

Not to say that this a new concept by any means!

Just, I don’t know?

I think I have a lot to offer in the ways of random music that some may have never heard before and could appreciate.

My musical tastes really are so vast that I couldn’t possibly imagine being able to write about every band I love even if I started right now!

I thought this might be a neat alternative to help counteract this!

I’m not sure if I’m going to make it a guaranteed weekly thing just yet or if I will simply do it whenever a song strikes me that feels right!

We’ll see how it goes!

The following song I only found myself for the first time a few years back and could not get over how I hadn’t heard it previously with how much I love it now!

It is easily one of the most relaxing songs I’ve ever heard, perfectly suited for early morning, late night listening, any time of day! I always tend to put it on when I’m in a rough spot and just need to wind down.

The song has many different opinions of the romantic aspects conveyed.

Perhaps you will even be able to relate yourself?

Musically and lyrically I will always love this song!

Lemme know what you think of either the song or my new idea in general, please!

I now present to you by the lovely Alex Turner off the album Submarine…

“Stuck On The Puzzle”

I’m not the kind of fool
Who’s gonna sit and sing to you,
About stars, girl.

But last night I looked up into
The dark half of the blue,
And they’d gone backwards.

Something in your magnetism
Must have pissed them off,
Forcing them to get an early night.

I have been searching from
The bottom to the top
For such a sight
As the one I caught when I saw your

Fingers dimming the lights
Like you’re used to being told that you’re trouble
And I spent all night
Stuck on the puzzle

Nobody I asked
Knew how he came to be the one
To whom you surrendered

Any man who wasn’t led away
Into the other room
Stood pretending

That something in your magnetism
Hadn’t just made him drop
Whoever’s hand it was that he was holding.

I have been searching from
The bottom to the top
For such a sight
As the one I caught when I saw your

Fingers dimming the lights
Like you’re used to being told that you’re trouble
And I spent all night
Stuck on the puzzle

I tried to swim to the side
But my feet got caught in the middle
And I thought I’d seen the light
But oh no.

I was just stuck on the puzzle
Stuck on the puzzle.

I hope you enjoyed it!

“Missing pieces”by focusedcapture is licensed under CC BY 2.0

Media Mondays! Cowboy Bebop is getting a Live Action Netflix Adaptation!

I’m sure for plenty of you this is not new information.

I knew since I found out a few months back, that I would most likely make a post on this topic.

Cowboy Bebop is probably one of the most well known popular anime that exists!

Even fans who aren’t typically inclined to watch anime have often heard of and/or enjoyed the series!

This show will always hold a special place in my heart, being one of the first shows that ever made me fall in love with anime during the good ol’ “Toonami” days on Cartoon Network!

Often, many feel it is overrated which I can understand in some ways. The amazing characters and often philosophical views expressed even in the most simplest of episodes are more than enough to sell me though!

When I found out this show was getting the very “infamous” (in the anime world) live action series by Netflix I was as equally excited as I was dreading to see how much it was butchered…

Any anime fan or avid Netflix viewer would know that live action versions of anime no matter who they are made by are typically never that good…

Like at all!

I was very excited to hear that it would be a series instead of a movie which at least inspires some hope that it will not be rushed or a larger number of amazing potential scenes not being included.

The number one thing from what I have gathered reading information and opinions on this topic entailed would who play the leads?

Especially, with all the characters being extremely iconic and unique in their own respective ways!

Many rumors spread and were imagined for who could land the roles.

Until, only very recently were some released!

I’m just going to say right now that another common “theme” with these types of projects is something that is often referred to as “white washing.” Meaning simply that with anime being primarily of Asian descent that these various live action productions seldom include performers from these regions…

It would seem that this show took the opportunity to break this mold!

When, honestly? In my opinion…

This was the last show that something like this should have been corrected!

I don’t mean to imply that Spike, for example, the man character of the show should not be portrayed by an actor of Asian ancestry. Just simply that the setting of this series taking place in space with people from many various planets is different in a sense than other shows. It often even clearly portrays races of other people, where in this character is clearly not Asian. (This is all really here nor there for me personally and more just something I’ve come across researching the upcoming series.)

Just for a frame of reference the actor chosen to play Spike has been decided to be filled by John Cho.

Who some may be familiar with in movies such as “When Harold and Kumar go to White Castle” and the newer “Star Trek” films.

Spike has an attitude and presence that I worry about this actor being able to convey…

And I’m a fan for the most part!

They also chose to do this with another character named Jet (to be played by Mustafa Shakir) when the same set of circumstances with race in the show are often clearly expressed. With this portrayal, I don’t feel the presence of personality would be as apparent or strong as with Spike in my opinion, however. Also, I feel in some ways this is not that much of a stretch because Jet does almost have an odd skin shade, not that this should be relevant at all. Once again, I’ve just seen others mention this along side the previously stated.

The actress who is due to play Faye Valentine, Daniella Pineda, seems to fit the role at least slightly better than her fellow comrades. I’ve yet to see anything positive or negative about her yet.

Last I saw no one has been selected yet to play the wild-child hacker, Edward. (I love her for the record!)

This is not to say that all of these actors/actresses won’t do an amazing job!

Clearly, a ton of other factors will depend on whether this show will be a success or not.

Only time will tell what lies for this adaptation!

For all we know it could still end up breaking the mold and turning out to be something phenomenal!

We’ll see I guess space cowboys…

“Are-you-living-in-the-real-world-Spike”by luis_vega_1999 is licensed under CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

“cowboybebop5”by zaipe is licensed under CC BY-NC-ND 2.0

Trans-Topic Thursdays! Being Transgendered is in NO WAY a Choice!

Had a hard time finding a picture I liked for this topic, then I saw this berry and it just seemed almost perfect for what I wanted to express!

I often read or even come across others in my own life that still seem to think that being transgendered is somehow a choice…?

Trust me when I say, it is in no way a choice!

Sure, if you think someone would choose to be something that affects almost every aspect of their life!

More often than not since you were a small child!

That constantly makes you feel uncomfortable and anxious!

Leaving you struggling searching to find something that makes you feel even a little better!

Maybe, you find transitioning (or not transitioning) could be the only hope you have to find some type of relief from what you’ve always dealt with!

Yet, also this means being persecuted by a large amount of the population just for trying to be yourself!

When half the time you hate yourself plenty all on your own!

Then, who wouldn’t want to sign up for this as their life, right?!?!

Please, trust me when I say that being transgendered is in No Way a Choice!

It may sound extreme but for many of us it truly is a choice between life and death. We would rather not live anymore, or finally try to live our lives as who we have always truly been and hope for the best!

Let me stress a point here!

We are nothing but normal everyday people just trying to live our lives for the most part. We truly mean you no harm! I don’t understand the viewpoint that exists at all some seem to have that we are in anyway deviants of any kind?

Let’s stay on topic though for now, shall we?

Honestly, for any of you who may have ever taken a look at my “behemoth” of a post about “coming out” would know how much I tried to suppress being trans until it completely consumed me. For as large as that post may be, it only details very small parts of what I dealt with throughout my life.

I remember being in kindergarten and my class having a “Hawaiian Day” or something along those lines at school. I wore like a fake grass skirt home we had all made in class just because I liked it. This was innocent, I didn’t think anything of it really? When I got off the bus I remember my friend’s father calling me a “faggot” and telling me to take it off. This must have hurt me enough at the time to still make me remember it to this day.

Watching home videos and stuff now with my family, they often joke with me sometimes about how you can tell I was way more interested in my sister’s toys. I know at least one of them involved a ring from a “Pretty, Pretty Princess” game. (I’m far from a “princess” for the record, ha ha!)

Often when I was younger people would often mistake me for a girl. This would make me as equally happy as it would make me upset.

Then, you hit your teens and forget about it!

You are freaking out about everything!

It’s all just wrong and it kills you!

This can often lead to you experiencing depression for most of your teens, often following you into adult hood. You can try to find various ways to deny these feelings. Shut yourself down emotionally, alcohol, drugs, hobbies, various other distractions and vices but…

IT NEVER GOES AWAY!

And it never will go away!

No matter how you end up dealing with being transgender this is something you just end up needing to accept eventually or you will probably be miserable your entire life.

For many this path leads to transitioning like myself but others find plenty of other ways in some cases that allow them to find peace with themselves.

To each their own!

I’ve said before, gender is a spectrum and you can take all the time you need to find where your place on it lies!

That seems like as good a closing line as any!

Learn to love yourselves everyone!

No matter who are you!

Thank you so much for Reading!

“IMG_1408”by CoryDeanSmith.com is licensed under CC BY 2.0

“Not caring what other people think is the best choice you will ever make.”by deeplifequotes is licensed under CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

Media Mondays! MMORPGs! They have Saved my Life more than Once!

Never actually played this game but it looks awesome!

I know the title of this post may sound slightly extreme but in a lot of ways it’s honestly not that far off from the truth.

For those of you who may not be all that into the world of gaming, MMORPG stands for Massive Multiplayer Online Role Playing Game and is exactly as it sounds!

Games that you can play with many others online (across the entire world usually nowadays) which can vary in setting and game-play but typically are more fantasy based but not limited to this particular genre.

They mostly involve designing a character, picking a class, leveling up, taking quests, events, and plenty of other activities revolved around this basic concept primarily.

With all types of games and genres there will typically always be a sense of community in which you can share your interest with others who enjoy it as well!

In MMORPGs, however, community is almost the most important aspect that can make or break a particular game!

Meeting other players in game, helping each other complete the aforementioned quests, partying up, and maybe even forming or joining a guild (a group of many players) stands at the forefront as one of the most defining features of the genre!

These types of games can involve some type of story line (if any at all) but even when they do, more often than not, it’s usually not even worth paying attention to or you slowly begin to lose interest in it over time. I can only think of a very slim number of games in which this was an exception at least for me personally.

While, the graphics, classes, abilities, combat styles, etc. all influence whether I will usually even try a new potential game, what always make me stay is the friends I make in the process!

YES, FRIENDS!

I know this might sound like a crazy concept to call people you meet online actual friends, whether it be in a game or not, but I feel like especially in this day and age how can this not be the case?

Some friends I’ve made from games I’ve played over the years that I have long since stopped playing I still regularly communicate with through various means and have made life lasting bonds in some cases! I mean you talk to, interact with, have fun with doing various activities while playing the game itself or just being social.

What makes this any different than what you would do with friends “in real life?”

I’ve had real conversations and experiences with people that have helped me get through some of the hardest times of my life, as well as me doing the same for them!

This above all else, as stated above, is the main reason I have always continued to play at least one of these types of games almost my entire life since my early teens!

I feel even more so for myself that this was such a great experience for me was because I was transgendered. It was always a place that I could fully be myself and that was always an amazing escape from my “regular life.” It honestly even helped me once I started to transition because it helped me “readjust” to myself socially in a sense?

Granted, this is not at all something that needs to be limited to my specific circumstances! I feel it can be just as beneficial for others who may not have many friends or feel like an outcast for example, to be able to gain an opportunity to make real connections with others.

I know plenty may not feel these can qualify as “real connections” but I ask once again, why is this any different than any other type of relationship?

In a sense, how many other activities can allow you to interact with so many different types of people from all across the globe simultaneously?

It truly is nothing short of amazing to me in so many ways!

As I often tend to do with my posts, I bring this particular interest of mine to attention not just strictly to express my love for it, but also to potentially open up the idea for someone else to try it if they may have never done so before!

Gaming in general has made many strides in all levels of society over the years and I’m so happy that it has because it’s an amazing unique hobby to have in my opinion!

Thank you so much for Reading!

Till next time!

“Black Desert Online Gets Ancient Kutum World Boss”by BagoGames is licensed under CC BY 2.0