Karma! Are You a Believer?


Karma is a concept you often hear many people toss around and discuss at the drop of a hat in our daily lives. I wouldn’t imagine their are many people who are not familiar with the idea.

With most things along these lines I feel it needs to be taken with a grain of salt as they say.

It’s a comforting notion to think that those who do good things will be rewarded while those who do bad things will get what’s coming to them.

For the most part I have to say that I’m a believer myself.

Sometimes you can even see examples of “instant karma” where immediately after someone does something a reaction can take place almost right away to counteract the initial action.

I feel I have also witnessed this on a much grander scale of affecting people’s lives in a much more significant way, sometimes even much further down the line.

Sadly, as much as you can often see signs of karma taking effect, you will also see just as many incidents of those who do everything they possibly can for others while most of their life still can remain quite challenging.

So, does such a thing truly exist?

I tend to ponder this often when it pertains to my own life, seeming to have almost a perfect balance between good and bad luck.

I actually have an interesting story that could maybe explain my own personal state of being in this respect.

In my mid teens, probably around the age of 14-15, I had one of the most interesting interactions of my life with a “fortune teller.” This was something I had approached quite casually at the time believing that most of these types of things tend to be “acts” and solely for entertainment purposes. (This is not to say I’m not a believer in such abilities for the record!)

The reason I feel I have always remembered this particular occasion is because this is one of the only times with such a thing that this woman seemed so genuine and real. Long story short, she proceeded to tell me that my life would always be a constant struggle from the “bad karma” I was carrying from being a terrible person in my past life. (Clearly, this brings up an entirely different concept of reincarnation being real. Another topic I plan to discuss in the future!)

Honestly, though?

How many times have you ever heard of someone trying something like this and receiving such terrible news?

Aren’t these types of people supposed to tell you great fortune is in your future or the love of your life is right around the corner?

What did she possibly have to gain from saying such a thing?

I’ve questioned all this probably more than I should have throughout my life. She could have just been a “pro” in her field and just trying to seem legitimate but even still…

Keep in mind, I have by no means let this information control my thoughts or actions. It just always stuck with me for being an interesting experience is all.

It really does make a decent amount of sense for me as I began to explain earlier. How can I truly never have ever committed what I would consider to be malicious acts and still tend to have such bad luck more often than not? I’ve stated in previous posts in a completely non-boasting sense that I consider myself to be a pretty good person. I treat everyone exactly the same and always help others without ever expecting anything in return.

Is it truly this balance between my current karma and my past karma that gives me such an equal amount of “luck?”

Whatever the case may be, it is what it is!

It’s not like I would ever allow such a thing to rule me as I said.

What is life if not constant ups and downs for most part?

Regardless, if karma is real or not it would never change how I live my life and continue to treat others.

What are your thoughts on karma?

Are you a believer?


“Serendipity”by Maggie Houtz is licensed under CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

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Where Does Your Satisfaction Come From? What Does this Word Mean to You?


I honestly had no intentions of making this post by any means up until a few hours ago. I currently keep a notebook where I list my various topic ideas for the future and I suppose this will somewhat include some of those concepts as well as others I’ve mentioned in the past. A great deal was honestly inspired reading posts from a fellow blogger which made me realize that I had been thinking about this more so than I had even fully acknowledged recently.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, I am truly so in love with the world of blogging in terms of being able to share ideas and thoughts with others. Blogging is more a personal autobiographical diary for me above all else really. If anyone appreciates or takes anything from it, that is all really just a plus to me.

Stay on topic, Cailin!

This all really goes hand in hand with what has even had all this on my mind recently though. Anyone who may have read my introductory post would have seen that I came across WordPress completely by accident while filling out a job application. I created one myself primarily at first just to get a feel for the site if I did manage to get the position I applied for. (I did not if you’re curious.)

Blogging and writing has always been appealing to me and something I was interested in trying but never pursued for whatever reason.

(I feel like I’m making this more about blogging which was not my intention…)

My overall point in all this rambling I suppose is that I’m a big believer in that everything happens for a reason for the most part. I’ve also found that this is a great outlet for me to occasionally organize the endless flow of thoughts that constantly occur within my head.

Jumping back to me pursuing other means of employment recently is what primarily put the current topic of discussion back into my mind. One I have always often come back to over the years for a number of reasons.

What I do for a job/career has honestly never been that important to me. I honestly have a ton of respect for anyone who truly knows what they want for themselves in this regard in many ways! When I was younger I always just wanted to help people until I realized that this could never be achieved for me in the way I wanted it to be. (I’ve mentioned this more in depth in previous posts so I won’t continue to ramble any further on unrelated things.)

My primary reason for bringing this up is with my current change in circumstances over the past few months I feel like once again I find myself bombarded by others who feel I don’t apply myself and/or waste my potential. I was completely content and happy with my old profession as well as past and future endeavors. As stated above this has never been important to me.

In all honestly, what anyone does for a living isn’t really of any interest to me for the most part. I care far more about who you are as a person and in life than your status or how much money you may make. You could make a million dollars a year and I could care less if you aren’t a good person. Granted some are able to combine helping others and/or including their passions within their professions but for most, sadly, this is not a realistic luxury. I feel this applies more nowadays than ever before.

I have never been a materialistic person in any sense whether it be what I wear, drive, own, or where I live. None of this has ever meant anything to me, nor does it matter to me in terms of anyone else’s life. If I ever do find myself overly wealthy for some reason I would probably still drive a “beater” vehicle and live in a smaller home with rather “bohemian” decor, ha ha!

I’ve never understood anyone who desires status and/or wealth feeling that this will somehow make them happy or have this need to prove anything to anyone else.

As long as I am surrounded by good people that I love, being a good person, helping others whenever I can expecting nothing in return, all while truly believing I am doing my best than what more could I ask for?

I really meant the entire theme of this post involving “satisfaction” in the generalist terms I possibly could!

I mean it also in the ways I just stated above including never expecting anything from anyone when I’m nice to them or help them. I feel like many do this for the sense of satisfaction or achievement which I will never understand as well.

I feel others even with some things can almost force a sense of satisfaction out of wanting to prove something and/or other exceptions of society in a completely different way. For example, the way that some may be obsessed with taking photos of themselves, others, places, or experiences just to prove they have/did them? (If that makes any sense at all…) I feel this reigns true more now than ever with “social media” being so important to many.

As also just mentioned above, I truly feel I have always lived and tried my absolute hardest in all aspects of life regardless of what anyone else may think about me. If I was to die tomorrow for whatever reason I would do so knowing that I was content and happy with myself all around until this point. I’ve had a great life so far honestly with many different types of experiences and people with hopefully much more still to come that I can’t even imagine.

I feel that many seem to limit their own personal satisfaction by things that other people or society put in place for them. They think they need an established career, to get married, purchase a house, have children, etc. and while all these things are well and good allowing many to feel a sense of satisfaction. You should by no means feel this is the only path to take or the only things that matter.

(I’d like to point out I have previously accomplished all of the aforementioned in the past for the record! None of this when all was said and done made me particularly happy for a number of reasons, with the only exception being my children.)

I guess I should wrap up this rambling once again with my initial question in the title of this post!

Where does your satisfaction come from?

What does this word even really mean?

I honestly couldn’t be more intrigued to potentially hear others thoughts on this subject!

As stated above, however, this is more just me needing to work out the thoughts in my own mind. About how others have recently made me reflect and think about my own actions and achievements. I know I can honestly say without a doubt that I am happy and down right proud of myself and how I’ve lived my life so far.

I don’t care what anyone else thinks about it and I never will!

Neither should you!

Whatever makes you happy and leaves you feeling satisfied with your life than keep doing it!

What else is life about?

Thank you so much for Reading!

(Jeez…I had a feeling that was going to be a long one no matter how hard I tried but come on girl…I really am the ramble on queen whether in real life or in writing even when I try my best, ha ha!)


“Lake Como, Belmar”by Khaz is licensed under CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

Trans-Topic Thursdays! The Importance of Always Being Yourself! (By No Means Strictly a Trans Related Post!)


One thing I can not stand almost more than anything else is fake people! Something about this type of person, at least for me personally, is always so easy to pick up on and identify right off the bat. I couldn’t pin point exactly what it is about them that makes it so obvious per se. I feel it primarily has to just be mainly you can tend to tell when a person is trying to hard I suppose? I would imagine this has to become quite exhausting on occasion.

I’ve made it a habit since I was very young to only surround myself with genuine people whenever I was able to make the choice on who I spent my time with. I can’t think of many close friends I’ve ever had in my life that didn’t fit this qualification.

I understand fully that in some circumstances in can sometimes be necessary to put up some type of front or “wear a mask” as they say. Depending on the type of work environment you may find yourself in for example. I know I have personally worked many jobs that required a healthy amount of customer service. This sure does not mean that I keep up this level of presentation with my coworkers or even all customers however. I know a good majority of us can often hold back when first meeting someone whether it be a new potential friend or family member. This is completely normal as well! I’m talking mainly in the sense of once these relationships have been established for a reasonable amount of time.

I know for myself that any ability I ever had to hide anything of myself from anyone has all but completely faded since I started hormones and began transitioning.

(See, we are getting into why this is more of a trans-topic post now!)

I’m not entirely sure if this is more based on the mental changes I have undergone, just being tired of holding back my full “true self” for so long, or the latter.

I can say from my own experience and interactions with other transgender individuals that you will rarely encounter one of us that isn’t completely a genuine person! This applies more so once you get farther into your transition I feel for the most part but this is by no means always the case!

A piece of advice I’d like to give to those who may be just beginning to transition (or really anyone for that matter) is letting yourself fully find out who you are. I mean this more in the sense as to never feel the need to limit yourself by expectations!

Never let anyone or anything make you feel that you have to be anything that you’re not!

What I mean by this mainly to give an example, I tended to feel like early on in my own transition that some expected me to like overly change somehow in the sense that I would be stereo-typically more “girly” or something along these lines.

Do not get me wrong!

I am plenty “girly” in a number of different ways, ha ha!

However, I would say I am far from being dominantly so!

I am beyond “tom-boyish” in plenty of ways as well!

Once again though, what is all this honestly based on in the first place except for certain expectations put in place by our society?

What exactly is it that make such things absolutely have to be more preferred or “normal” by one gender over the other?

Why can’t people just be people?

I suppose this can sound a bit odd from someone who felt so strongly about their gender identity that they felt the need to change certain aspects of herself to feel more comfortable but I would hope you understand my point here, ha ha!

Back to just talking more in a general sense!

I feel like a common area this can apply for anyone is often being embarrassed or ashamed of your interests.

Whether they may be considered nerdy/geeky (whatever the heck this even means once again!) or anything in general for whatever reason a friend/family member of yours doesn’t approve of.

First and foremost!

Learn to stop caring at all what people think about you in any sense of the word!

I realize that this can be much easier said than done depending on the situation but does it really need to be?

Own whatever it is that you enjoy and makes you yourself!

And love yourself for it!

We are all incredibly unique people and this is what makes us all fantastically amazing!

No one else in this world no matter what will ever be exactly who you are!

Remember this!

Not only have I personally embraced my gender identity over the past five or so years but this process has also made me learn to be myself completely and fully! (Whether I want to be or not for the most part as stated above, ha ha!) I have all but ceased trying to hide my “weird” and often “crazy” self from anyone no matter who you are! Random stranger on street, my friends, my family, anyone!

I know I already stated this above but once again learn to love yourself for what makes you special!

I can almost guarantee that if you own whatever makes you uniquely yourself that you will become a ton happier than you have ever been in your life!

(As I often like to include in various posts! Always keeping in mind as long as this never involves harming anyone or causing anyone any kind of pain! If you do feel like this then please do yourself a favor and seek some type of help, ha ha!)

If you don’t love yourself for whatever reason right now, take comfort in the fact that even though I might not know you, I love you!

I mean this sincerely!

I tend to be cursed with this ability to always see the good in people and find something I like about you even with the aforementioned “faker” types. I’m sure you have your reasons for acting the way you do!

Thank you so much for Reading!


“Morning Hike”by SewPixie is licensed under CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

I’ve Never Felt Age was as Relevant as Some Often Make it Seem.


I’d like to first start by saying do not get me wrong at all to think I don’t feel that age can in some circumstances hold some level of relevance. I do feel, however, that more often that not it is rarely all that relative at all.

I feel shortly after most of us finish our varying levels of education/enter the workforce that people typically have a general sense of who they are and how they view the world. Not to say that some are not open and capable of changing in major ways but this in itself tends to be a bit of a rarity in my opinion.

I remember coming to this realization fairly soon in my early twenties. When you are still in school in your teens many still seem to have this view that “adults” are so much different than themselves at the time. (My sister being a very funny example of this still seeming to feel this way even now being 30.)

When I first became employed at a company full time regularly beginning to interact with others of all ages I came to the conclusion that by this point in most people lives that age really doesn’t mean anything. Everyone for the most part is primarily the same when it comes to what they may want, need, or desire. They have hopes, dreams, struggles, opinions, etc.

I remember I used to hardly be able to stand when anyone would jump to any type of conclusions about me as a person based solely on age. I have never considered myself to be typical in this sense often referring to the old expression of being an “old soul.” I have always thought and reflected on things that sometimes those much older than me at the time probably still have never gave a second thought in their lives.

I try my absolute best to remember to keep this mindset whenever I tend to interact with others who are younger than myself. I currently work with a young man who was only 19 when I initially met him. I have had more mature and thought provoking conversations with this person even more so than I have with people double or even triple his age. I often have even on some occasions forgotten how young he is sometimes because he in no way reflects any type of stereotypical “youth mentalities.”

Once again, this is all not to say that age does not in fact sometimes have relevance in some circumstances. Situations such as building a life for yourself including various achievements you hoped to obtain and being able to support yourself are primarily things that some can only learn with time. This concept itself is in no way a universal truth for all though as well by any means. You could be born into wealth or become famous at a young age for example.

This leads right into my next point being that a person’s age in no way reflects experiences they may have had that others can never relate to. This could range from simple things to ones that are very extreme. They could have lost a parent or friend at a young age, struggled with different types of abuse, come from a completely different national origin than you, the list is literally endless but I think you get my point.

You really can never know what goes on in someone’s head or what they may have dealt with simply just going by age or appearances.



This is just a simple thought I’ve always had in my life since I was very young and have often discussed with others. It is in no way intended to be taken all that seriously. I feel it is simply an interesting concept that can vary greatly in the opinions others may share.

I mean even think about in the distant past how short lifespans were and how different things could be as far as when people would achieve various “life milestones.” Age is as relevant as time itself. It honestly is all more just a matter of perception and how you choose to view things.

So, next time you may make a snap judgement about a person whether they be younger or older than you, maybe just take a second to really think about that before you do!

Thank you so much for Reading!


“DSC06567”by Poisoned_Pics_Photography is licensed under CC BY-SA 2.0

“Ageing”by paulbence is licensed under CC BY-NC 2.0

Where did all the Good People go…?

While laying in my bed at 7 in the morning here on what is now Saturday, I find myself unable to stop thinking about a topic I find myself often coming back to.

One I’m sure many of us often ponder!

I feel, more and more nowadays, that you continue to keep seeing and hearing people talk about slowly losing what little “faith in humanity” they may have left.

I find myself, more often than not, agreeing with this line of thinking no matter how depressing it may be!

However, no matter how much I do occasionally feel this way I still never seem to be able to lose my sense of “hope” whether I want to or not. I always tend to see the good in people when others may not be able to. (Unless they may have done something “absolutely unforgivable” which honestly is only a few things that are mostly universally acknowledged to be terrible. As such, I won’t begin to list them off at this time.)

I’m not one to “toot my own horn” as they say, but throughout most of my life I have always had people, both personally and professionally, tell me that I’m “one of the nicest people they have ever met!”

Honestly, I’ve never understood this…

What makes me that much different from the vast majority that allows people to pick up on this about me when I don’t feel I do anything special at all…

Is it because I always treat everyone the same no matter what?

Or that I genuinely care about everyone that I meet no matter how big or small the interaction may be?

I truly don’t understand it most the time, and as much as it is nice to hear it also makes me just as sad…

For so many people to say this when I do nothing phenomenal is just upsetting I guess?

I feel like most of the stuff you learn when your in say, kindergarten are honestly the best words you can ever live by!

“Treat others how you want to be treated!”

“If you have nothing nice to say, it may be better to say nothing at all.”

You know? Simple phrases and sayings along these lines.

It all sounds so simple to me and I don’t understand why it’s so hard for some to be like this?

Sure, I understand that human nature can be a very hard thing to overcome sometimes. The norm, more often that not, in our society is one of selfishness sadly…

I can’t blame anyone for this!

I understand but when such simple words and actions for all you know could make all the difference in a person’s day then why not simply do that…?

It baffles me most of the time to say the least!

In my younger days, I used to be one of those people who would rant and rave about how they were gonna CHANGE THE WORLD AND MAKE IT BETTER PLACE!

I still do feel this way for the most part but I am, however, significantly less passionate about it then I once was.

This kills me some days!

Indifference of good people being one of the greatest evils and all that jazz being another very well known popular phrase!

Growing older just, sadly, has a way of crushing your hopes and dreams when you are constantly just bombarded by the realities of life I suppose?

I’ve come to accept, for the most part, that the change I’ve always wanted to see in the world is “idealistic.” Most likely, it will never happen until like some great disaster or tragedy causes all of humanity to come together, or something along those lines, in the best possible way!

With the current state of things, especially in recent years, whether this end up being brought on by natural means or otherwise could very well be in the near future for all I know. I just truly pray that if such an event does ever occur that humanity can truly come out triumphant.

I mentioned once briefly in a previous post about one of the reasons why I love blogging so much is because you get news and information right from the mouths of real people. I stopped following more traditional forms of these quite some time ago. It’s really the only way I’ve been able to mildly be able to function without constantly being depressed about the state of the world.

I’ll never be able to understand things like war, poverty, corporate greed, etc…

Once again, I know this is all very idealistic but I truly never will.

It baffles me when we are beyond capable of changing things that would allow everyone adequate resources and the basic necessities of life why we just don’t simply put this into action as a society?

Nowadays, I mainly just live by another very common phrase and/or philosophy, “Be the change you want to see in the World!

If even one person is in someway affected and/or touched by a simple gesture or kind word that influences them to reflect and perhaps act as such more in their own lives then couldn’t this potentially trickle down until the whole world was affected?

I know this is not realistically possible but it’s a nice thought none the less.

Human nature will always still be what it is. At least, with the way our current society continues to function.

Anyways, just some late night/early morning thoughts from a girl who tends to struggle to sleep on a daily basis!

(The title for this post was slightly influenced by the genius musician and master poet Jack Johnson for any of my music loving followers out there! I really have to make a “Media Mondays” post on that man one day because just WOW! He truly is nothing short of amazing!)

Thank you so much for Reading!

Be good to each other people!

It’s not that hard of a concept!

“Searching waves”by maik_sv is licensed under CC BY-NC-ND 2.0