Karma! Are You a Believer?


Karma is a concept you often hear many people toss around and discuss at the drop of a hat in our daily lives. I wouldn’t imagine their are many people who are not familiar with the idea.

With most things along these lines I feel it needs to be taken with a grain of salt as they say.

It’s a comforting notion to think that those who do good things will be rewarded while those who do bad things will get what’s coming to them.

For the most part I have to say that I’m a believer myself.

Sometimes you can even see examples of “instant karma” where immediately after someone does something a reaction can take place almost right away to counteract the initial action.

I feel I have also witnessed this on a much grander scale of affecting people’s lives in a much more significant way, sometimes even much further down the line.

Sadly, as much as you can often see signs of karma taking effect, you will also see just as many incidents of those who do everything they possibly can for others while most of their life still can remain quite challenging.

So, does such a thing truly exist?

I tend to ponder this often when it pertains to my own life, seeming to have almost a perfect balance between good and bad luck.

I actually have an interesting story that could maybe explain my own personal state of being in this respect.

In my mid teens, probably around the age of 14-15, I had one of the most interesting interactions of my life with a “fortune teller.” This was something I had approached quite casually at the time believing that most of these types of things tend to be “acts” and solely for entertainment purposes. (This is not to say I’m not a believer in such abilities for the record!)

The reason I feel I have always remembered this particular occasion is because this is one of the only times with such a thing that this woman seemed so genuine and real. Long story short, she proceeded to tell me that my life would always be a constant struggle from the “bad karma” I was carrying from being a terrible person in my past life. (Clearly, this brings up an entirely different concept of reincarnation being real. Another topic I plan to discuss in the future!)

Honestly, though?

How many times have you ever heard of someone trying something like this and receiving such terrible news?

Aren’t these types of people supposed to tell you great fortune is in your future or the love of your life is right around the corner?

What did she possibly have to gain from saying such a thing?

I’ve questioned all this probably more than I should have throughout my life. She could have just been a “pro” in her field and just trying to seem legitimate but even still…

Keep in mind, I have by no means let this information control my thoughts or actions. It just always stuck with me for being an interesting experience is all.

It really does make a decent amount of sense for me as I began to explain earlier. How can I truly never have ever committed what I would consider to be malicious acts and still tend to have such bad luck more often than not? I’ve stated in previous posts in a completely non-boasting sense that I consider myself to be a pretty good person. I treat everyone exactly the same and always help others without ever expecting anything in return.

Is it truly this balance between my current karma and my past karma that gives me such an equal amount of “luck?”

Whatever the case may be, it is what it is!

It’s not like I would ever allow such a thing to rule me as I said.

What is life if not constant ups and downs for most part?

Regardless, if karma is real or not it would never change how I live my life and continue to treat others.

What are your thoughts on karma?

Are you a believer?


“Serendipity”by Maggie Houtz is licensed under CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

Just Wanted to Let You All Know I’m Still Here… (Also, I was Fired for the First Time in my Life…)


I can’t believe it’s been an entire month since I apologized for not being able to post after losing power for those few days weeks ago…

To say the least, that was the beginning of me entering one of my lovely “bad things tend to happen in threes” scenarios.

I find this quite funny considering one of the posts I had been working on at this time was on karma and how relevant it tends to be to my life in this respect. I will most likely edit said topic shortly after this and post it soon. Even though it seems odd to work on something I wrote over a month ago so we’ll see how that goes. It may not reflect my current feelings and circumstances which just wouldn’t feel right…

I sadly currently find myself in a very low place which occurs more often than I’d like in the course of my life. I found that when I first began to blog that it was very useful in helping me in this respect. Not only in organizing my own thoughts but also to help give me a task that I enjoyed doing. It doesn’t even necessarily feel right to post in a state of mind when I am not all that positive since this is what I always hope to inspire and convey. I am all about being real as well though which I guess is bound to coincide with this at times. I’m struggling very much right now to find anything that can hold my attention or give me even a moment of relief.

Gotta love depression!

It actually feels wrong to call this depression since actual clinical depression is typically brought on by nothing at all (which I’m no stranger to as well!) and this time I certainly have circumstances that have triggered my current feelings. (Or lack there of I should say…it’s sad how I still tend to revert to my “pre-transition” defense mechanism at times.)

I’m truly trying my best to not let my anxiety consume me as it has so many times before in the past.

To make a long story short, once my power was finally restored I came back to find my internet had been shut off which left me unable to post and I was only able to afford to restore it a few days ago. I live all by myself and just basic necessities are hard for me to maintain even when I do make decent money.

I briefly mentioned once I believe in my post on “satisfaction” that my job circumstances had recently changed for various reasons leading me to make a significant amount less than I was before so.

I had become completely content with this change in career because I thoroughly enjoyed the change of work experience and was really good at it if I do say so myself! My friend was my manager, with me being one of his assistant managers. I was happy and finally starting to feel better but with most good things in life this sadly came to an end sooner rather than later…

A number of “drama packed” incidents occurred within my company as they seem to do more often than not over my past two years with them which ended with my friend/boss quitting. This left my store in quite a disarray.

Two weeks later….for the first time in my life…

I was FIRED!

I was asked to leave one night with absolutely no reasoning by the person who was chosen to replace my boss. At first, he wouldn’t even give me a reason as I stated, just abruptly told me to clock out and leave for the night. Eventually, coming outside to speak to me informing me he heard rumors me and a fellow manager were planning a “mutiny.” Yes, he literally used this word…

The other girl and I were utterly shocked by this statement to say the least and couldn’t believe we were being dismissed for nothing but “locker room rumors” considering we were practically running the day to day operations entirely by ourselves. It ended with him saying we could both return to work the following day. The next morning, however, I woke up to a voicemail saying once again that I was no longer needed and that was that.

This was only last week…

I honestly wasn’t sure if I had planned to return regardless after such events having never experienced such disrespect and lack of trust in a workplace.

I’m still taking it quite hard because not only have I been told by every manager I’ve ever previously had within this company that I’m one of the “best workers they have ever had” but also for it to all to be so personal and really still without proper reasoning for my dismissal.

Others and myself have come to realize the whole situation may have had to do with me being trans, with it all just being an excuse to get rid of me which is something I’ve yet to deal with in a work place scenario. Perhaps why I didn’t even consider it at first.

This was a situation in which this middle-aged gentlemen used to treat me entirely different before he found out about me. He had actually worked below me at the time before his advancement and was no stranger to the occasional comment or more straightforward attempt to “hit on me.” After he was told, even though my interactions with him had changed, I never thought he would let it affect our professional relationship. Especially when I did so much for him after he took over.

At this point, it’s all neither here nor there I suppose…

I really only planned to make this a very quick entry stating that I was still around and hoping to become more active again.

I think I’m going to mix it up and just start to post whenever the time strikes me and feels right. Not to say that I ever forced anything in the past. I may revert back to a more solid schedule in the future. For now, however, I think this is the best plan until my life becomes a touch more stable again.

I know I have at least four or so drafts to edit and hopefully post in the near future I had previously already written, but I may just end up scrapping them at this point…

We’ll see!

Writing anew would probably be for the best right now in my current state anyway!

I’m sure I’ll push through like I always do!

Hope you all are doing well!

(I feel like I’m already going to regret this absolute drivel…at least I posted again at all.)


“Birds…”by nightshiftboy is licensed under CC BY-NC-SA 2.0