Trans-Topic Thursdays! My Recent Experience Trying Dating Apps for the First Time!


As the title would suggest, I recently only a short while ago decided to finally experiment with dating apps for the first time ever in my life.

I’m a very traditional girl in every sense of the word when it comes to relationships and the like.

I’m not the type to do one night stands or any type of random hook ups really. I prefer to actually date someone that I share a real connection with and don’t do so very often. I can easily count the number of serious relationships I’ve ever really had on one hand.

I’ve always been a sucker for “movie magic romance” I suppose.

Two people meet in real life by chance, instantly share a connection and it just grows from there. Maybe a good old damsel in distress scenario, love at first sight or any of the other various movie cliches they make you believe as a child, ha ha!

Clearly, I’m grown up a lot and have realized it takes a lot more than such things to make a relationship work. The sole reason for me expressing all this is simply I never thought I would ever try any type of dating app in my life.

So, how did it go you might be wondering?

I barely even know where to begin…

I was absolutely overwhelmed with messages to say the least! Easily over a hundred only within the first day or so…

I’ve only played around with two separate apps so far so I’m sure results can vary greatly depending on which ones you may try but I primarily dealt with the same things on both of these.

First of all, being transgendered, I am never one not to disclose this information to someone the second they show any type of romantic interest in me. (This has really hurt in a number of ways previously in “real life” for the record which may even be what prompted me to try this is the first place.) In both of my profiles I made sure to express I was trans right away in the first section of my introduction.

Yet still…

A good majority of men clearly don’t read this at all and I found myself on multiple occasions dealing with them being both shocked and/or disgusted!

This makes a girl feel fantastic I assure you! (Trademark Sarcasm!)

After I get done sorting through these lovely types of people I’ve found that three main groups of others remain!

  1. Regular run of the mill perverts/creeps! (Which I know all woman have experienced whether they want to or not!)
  2. Fetish types! (Who rarely are even well informed on trans-related topics)
  3. The very elusive potentially good guy!

I wouldn’t imagine I need to say much about how creepy some men can be. No offense to some of you gentlemen! Seriously, I even felt the need to eventually put in my profile that I won’t even respond if you instantly show me a pic of your “private areas,” then isn’t that almost enough said? Let alone just the instantaneous random very inappropriate comments!

Now, fetish types, this one almost deserves it’s own post in the future so I’ll try to keep this brief. If you at all attempt to approach or date a trans-person I can almost guarantee 100% of the time that they will never want to viewed as anything but themselves! If you have any interest in us just for being what we are then you need to GO AWAY!

This almost became a game to me at a point to make it my own personal pleasure to destroy these types of people! I would only do this after trying my best to honestly educate them on transgender individuals before so for the record.

This leads me right into my next point that applies to both these first two groups, being simply that in some circumstances that being transgendered somehow implies that you are “desperate” in the eyes of some people. I don’t understand what puts this idea in some peoples heads and maybe it doesn’t apply to all but it sure does to me! I have stayed single for quite some time by choice for the most part I promise you! I actually ended up adding this to my profile eventually as well even though it was about as helpful as everything else included on it…

Lastly, that leaves the extremely seldom found actually decent person who actually wants to attempt to have a conversation with you! I’d say from my experience this is roughly about 1/10 or so which is probably almost being a bit generous…

My experience so far in communicating with this rare breed has been quite the mixed bag. Sometimes it seems like you two are getting along extremely well only for them to turn out to be one of the other previously two mentioned types of people or just disappearing without any reason/word a good majority of the time.

I have since still, somewhat continued to talk to a few individuals off these apps but I’m not sure if anything will ever come from them or not. I did meet one person so far in person which went reasonably well but after that night I have yet to hear from them again. (Probably because I was unwilling to perform certain acts on our first meeting if your curious…)

I think I’ve learned the best way to approach this type of thing is to simply have no serious expectations and just try your best to keep it fun and casual?

I know many people I know personally have been lucky enough to find real long lasting relationships so I believe that it’s possible and some level of hope for achieving this exists if that’s what you so desire. If you go in with the mindset of knowing what you want or are looking for then I think it’s worth trying at least. Just certainly expect quite a wide variety of people to sort through before finding someone looking for something similar.

I personally don’t know how much longer I intend to keep using them myself honestly. I already have not used them for at least a week and have no idea if I plan to return to continue to do so currently.

Why do I have to be cursed with being such a romantic?!?

Kidding for the most part, but I do feel a certain level of truth exists in this statement for those who may feel similar to myself.

Dating sucks whether it’s the old fashioned way or by newer means!

I will always believe that eventually everyone will find love and happiness with someone else if that’s what they truly hope to find!

We all deserve love and support in our lives no matter who that may come from!

I feel like this post has ended up way longer than I intended even with trying my best to hold back so I’ll wrap it up here, as always…

Thank you so much for Reading!


“From Ads to Avenue of Chat: A History of Online Dating” by Jenny Waterson is licensed under CC BY-NC-ND 4.0

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I Swear I’m Naturally Nocturnal! Apparently, Not as Uncommon as One May Think!

Some of you may or may not have noticed but I’m almost 100% positive that the majority of my posts so far have primarily been made in the middle of the night!

(Currently, beginning this one at just a little after 4 in the morning!)

Morning People vs. Night Owls!

These are two of the primary examples you will often hear some proclaim when discussing their various sleep patterns!

Obviously, a good majority of the population will not necessarily fall so rigidly into either of these two categories.

Research over recent years has, however, indicated that our internal clocks which indicate are differing sleep patterns are innate for the most part and are influenced by our genes!

It also suggests that these particular rhythms for each individual’s sleep habits are not something you can ever really change! In fact, it may actually be harmful to your health to attempt to differ from them!

In some cases certain people are even diagnosed with a condition called Delayed Sleep Phase Disorder (DSPD) which is the most extreme form of “nocturnal” behavior which may come with various other symptoms as well.

I recall once reading another study in which a group of individuals were monitored during a sleep study in which the participants were isolated in rooms without any windows, other forms of natural light, or ways to interpret the passage of time. I remember the scientists being very surprised that even some in these conditions truly did exhibit nocturnal behavior even without other influences over the period of the study.

I’ve read countless personal stories of people dealing with this throughout their entire lives as well. For some it is an endless struggle constantly present in their daily lives while others have simply found ways of life and/or careers that can cater to this.

Personally, a good majority of the various jobs I’ve held throughout my own life have allowed me this comfort. I think I’ve really only worked one major job in my life that ever required me to wake up early. All the others began usually no later than 2pm. Anytime I am ever forced to keep “normal hours” I am always constantly tired!

I’ve primarily been this way since my teens which is usually when this type of behavior will typically manifest. Sure, most teens do tend to stay up later but seldom does it follow well into their adult lives. I remember high school practically being a “second bedroom” to me because I just literally could not keep my eyes open most of the time.

Especially, more so when you are young this type of behavior can often be associated with being “lazy” which I always hated. People with nocturnal tendencies typically don’t get their full blown energy burst and motivation until well into the evening. For me, I’d say it’s primarily around midnight when I really start to peak and am like..

“LET’S GET SOME STUFF DONE!”

This clearly comes with varying amounts of different challenges. It makes it very difficult, even almost impossible some days, to accomplish simple everyday normal tasks. Many businesses and organizations keeping in some cases set 9-5 hours of operation. I remember reading a fellow “nocturnal-er” joking once about how we should all just make our own little town somewhere and everything could just be open at night! Ha ha!

Usually, anytime I ever have to do anything that involves me to be up early I just end up staying up the entire night. Typically, going through the whole day without sleeping again until the following night.

(You really do start to lose it a pinch once you start pushing past 48 hours for the record!)

Having dealt with this almost my whole life it’s become fairly normal to me for the most part. Just kind of is what it is I suppose? I’ve almost come to like it in some ways. Peaceful and such?

Interesting side note!

My one sister has joked with me since we were younger that I am a “Vampire,” ha ha!

So, I do kind of hate the sun?

Really, all bright lights in general for that matter…

I have sensitive eyes! Leave me alone!

Sadly, if any of you folks like me may suffer from a similar “ailment” it looks like that’s never going to change!

At least, until maybe we get old and gray!

So, better get used to it!

As always, Thank you so much for Reading!

Sleep Well!

“Train Windows” by Murray Thompson is licensed under CC BY-NC-ND 4.0

“Moon Tile”by Gary Denness is licensed under CC BY-NC-SA 2.0